Connection
What is this elusive 'connection' everyone is looking for? Someone I chatted to, just on messages, seemed to believe we had a 'connection' because we were messaging! Connection for me is something only found in its real sense on meeting.
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Comments (68)
rarity23 - 20 Sep, 2024 - 11:43AM
I've found that you do build a connection from message 1, and can tell you are going to hit it off.
I'd rather do that, that swap PW from the start, after all, you have a written description of what they are like.
A lot will ask for a PW straight away, and nothing has ever led to anything with those ladies.
Obviously when you meet it's either then going to go somewhere or not, usually building on what you initially started in my experience.
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Life is a beach - 14 Sep, 2024 - 10:54PM
The connection does start with the first messages.
I started messaging with my IE before even seeing his picture, yes, risky I know! Either of us could have been Quasimodo 😅. I was and still am excited to check if there is a message there.
We of course exchanged pictures before our first meeting.
I met a couple of people in a public place before my current IE and the chemistry wasn't there on the meeting.
You can tell by the messages but the true connection can only fully develop after meeting the person.
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boav91 - 14 Sep, 2024 - 06:49AM
I have had probably two real connections on ie. They both were very clear once the chat flowed it was easy and in no way effortful. The first was her first time on ie, and she got cold feet before the meet stage so did not happen. The second we met and I am still with. You can easily tell when it clicks from the one message every other day type where it is like pulling hens teeth.
It is hard to define more than it just works and you can pass time without even noticing. It just works
You know when you know and like marklondonengland says, it meant there was an anticipation and connection before we met and that just confirmed we liked each other and wanted to carry on.
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1703219 - 05 Sep, 2024 - 10:02PM
Connection for me is a sense of relaxation when we communicate, a sense of being on the same page. And the willingness to explore differences as opposed to ghosting.
marklondonengland - 02 Sep, 2024 - 07:46PM
This contradicts some other messages here that ask about 'you're great' messages... it is possible to develop a good connection with someone when messaging. You can get to the point where you are looking forward to checking for new messages and it is an exciting way to build a bond together. I have usually found that if someone is interesting when messaging and can keep a conversation flowing, then they will be interesting in person. It's not 100% foolproof, but this is usually true, so it can be possible to build a genuine connection even before meeting in person... in fact, isn't it important to do so, or would you arrange to meet someone who had only sent a message saying 'you're great!'
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Imnotthemessiah - 01 Sep, 2024 - 10:26PM
Real connection is that flutter in your chest you get when you look in your IE’s eyes and see the spark of passion reflected back to you.
Stevestovil - 31 Aug, 2024 - 10:18PM
I think we are all multi dimensional. The challenge here is we select through the single dimensions of words and pictures. If you have a deficiency in one of those areas then it does how desirable you are in the multi dimensional real life. I have had 2 successful meetings through here leading to passionate encounters. Neither asked to see a picture first, where I am asked for a flat 2D representation of the complex 3D me, I am never selected.
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1671533 - 31 Aug, 2024 - 08:55AM
I struggle to express myself online. That doesn't mean I can't write a coherent sentence - it means it takes a lot of effort and time to do so. So for me, making a 'connection' will only come from talking to one another on the phone.
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Unwoke! - 31 Aug, 2024 - 08:42AM
What is love? How long is a piece of string? Does my bum look big in this?
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