New to this
Hi all I'm new to this and never cheated before. Does it get easier?
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Comments (245)
HugDealer - 26 Nov, 2024 - 09:13AM
Love your response Return to Forever. I have been with my partner for 27 years and never been with anyone else. I am here to find what's missing.
I would say that if you have a feeling of guilt then you need to address that before you embark on this journey because otherwise the guilt will eat away at you.
Gratch - 20 Nov, 2024 - 11:49AM
I think a lot of these answers are good, as you rightly say, make peace with yourself and what you are doing or about to do and embrace it, if then you find it doesn't get easier then maybe this isn't for you, I try not to dwell on the word "cheating" and much prefer perfidious, but whichever way you want to look at it, as long as you have the right mindset and you can hold sway then yes it does get easier
Return to Forever - 18 Nov, 2024 - 08:57PM
Get your mindset right…..seriously…it’s all about your point of view.
If you persist (and this is no criticism by the way….a lot of people do this) in thinking that this is all about “cheating”, “back stabbing” “harming”, “lying” etc then those are all massively negative concepts and it’ll be a long day at the office so to speak.
If on the other hand you approach it with the mindset that actually something in your life is missing and you want to proactively do something about it within your own gift whilst not harming your OH/partner etc then that is a much more positive approach and might lead to better outcomes for you and those you have an affair with?
Just my 2p
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Life is a beach - 17 Nov, 2024 - 10:52AM
Exotic Orchid,
He is always checking my phone with me at around Christmas time as I show him Christmas messages from others as I said in my other posts. Notifications off is a must for me!
To answer the post, it gets a little easier to think of excuses, just keep them close to your real life and don't take any risks, nor put your IE at risk
Be careful and enjoy yourselves!
ExoticOrchid - 17 Nov, 2024 - 06:39AM
"My husband is always checking my phone"
Not much independence and empowerment then!!! 🤷🏻♀️
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Life is a beach - 16 Nov, 2024 - 11:18PM
I posted here a year ago, I was still a little green to this.
Yes, you start learning more, you get more creative with your excuses. You start learning on how to best avoid risks.
Stupidly enough after posting on this thread I nearly got caught, I forgot to turn my notifications off at Christmas 🤦🏻♀️. My husband is always checking my phone. Luckily I managed it!
Don't get complacent don't take any unnecessary risks!
In answer to the question, it doesn't get easier but you get better with your excuses 😉.
Don't take any risks!
Clickable Connection - 16 Nov, 2024 - 08:01PM
@laugar164 - agreed , if you're finding it difficult already, perhaps this is not for you ?
You've got do your thinking and make your pease with this BEFORE searching for a IE partner.
@Paula99 - agreed , in terms of logistics, you do get used hiding your indiscretions. Get used to making excuses why you're not at home. And finally you get used to leading that double life.
Like all things in life , the more you do it, the better you get at it
Paula99 - 16 Nov, 2024 - 07:00AM
It is much easier once you have taken a the giant leap into having an affair …you become accustomed to ‘hiding in plain sight ‘…your home life becomes more bearable and you relax a little.. ..the most difficult part is taking the step
Then you hit the realms of ‘reality’ and the need to be emotionally mature …plus being able to compartmentalise your ‘double life ‘…it’s not possible for some and you are entitled to your ‘wobble ‘ so the answer is yes and no ..😁
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