How much is too much?
Does anyone else find it drags you down when you are chatting to someone, it's going well, and then they commence to dump their emotional baggage onto you? Complaining about their life choices, their wife/husband, their problems at home, why their partner isn't giving them sex, their kids, their relatives? Particularly when you've not even met? Turn off?
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Comments (94)
Japnee - 24 Feb, 2024 - 08:31AM
Yes personal problems aren’t really my thing and don’t like talking about them to anyone. Conversations usually end up diverting into arguments about topics we barely know anything about
Doctor13702 - 22 Feb, 2024 - 02:08PM
When I have been with someone for a while it's natural that talk of their family life enters into the conversation.
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1648884 - 20 Feb, 2024 - 11:45PM
I thought the whole idea of being here is to escape your normal life, just enjoy and have fun,
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Marlen - 20 Feb, 2024 - 11:12PM
Sometimes sharing 'emotional baggage' can help you see the other person, in reality, not perfection. We all have some. It may help you reflect on your own and maybe, bring you closer together. It isn't about whining, but can give greater context as to why you're here and maybe worth getting together.
Or it could be a sophisticated game play, for a male player to get inside someone's knickers quicker, by playing to a lady's caring and nurturing side, working her maternal instincts, which might override her other more cautious instincts.
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Club 18-30 rep - 20 Feb, 2024 - 10:45PM
I’m guessing most here will have emotional baggage but I suppose we are all here to release from that although I do find sometimes listening to others allows for more understanding between both parties.
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1494077 - 20 Feb, 2024 - 09:39PM
Everybody has a degree of baggage, and some might be shared, as a passing point of disclosure. Saying that, there aren’t enough hours in my day to entertain any more than cursory info from a stranger that I have never met. There are professionally trained people out there who are paid to do a good listening job. Use them.
If a person has that much emotional and mental baggage, should they even be on IE? It seems hardly fair to inflict themselves on people who have come here for a bit of positive fun and frolics.
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Paula99 - 20 Feb, 2024 - 06:02PM
Most people come with some sort of ‘baggage’ …the older we get the more emotionally mature we are to deal with it…
The nature of this question suggests to me that IE is not the right place at the moment…off loading all of your issues should be organised with the right support..the people on here have all different reasons for joining this platform but for the most it’s a sense of escape and to experience the elements that are absent from your partnership..
We all have a lot going on in our lives and we don’t really want to add the ‘extra drama’…I appreciate that we do need someone to talk to but IE isn’t the place ..sadly
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FluffyClouds - 20 Feb, 2024 - 04:48PM
Sort your 'head' out and your 'baggage' out before you come onto IE. Whilst it could be seen as 'connection' unloading all your problems onto your IE or someone you are just chatting to, it's also treating them like some kind of therapist/psychiatrist. Maybe they should be your first port of call before registering here. 🤷
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1645560 - 20 Feb, 2024 - 03:43PM
Not really tbh... I find people interesting and it provides plenty of hooks to make easy conversation. Some women on the other hand are so guarded its like getting blood from a stone or they just don't bother asking questions back which bores me to tears very quickly.
That said I want to craft a fun and happy secret space, so like most things, its a balance!
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