When should I declare a disability?
When joining IE there are opportunities to declare your age, religion, sex , ethnicity and sexuality but nothing about disability. Now I support the Social Model of Disability - put simply , it is the barriers in society that disable people with impairments, not the impairment itself.
Declaring a disability is a bit of a minefield on IE . Declaring too early and you crash and burn. Don't declare at all and you might be giving a completely wrong impression about who you are.
So should I included a nuanced mention to being a disabled person in my profile or not? I would love to chat with ladies who are in the same situation but how on earth can we identify each other here when it is so difficult to declare?
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Comments (28)
1602525 - 06 Feb, 2024 - 03:06PM
When you think about this it is probable we are thinking about our own future here. The vast majority of us will be affected by disability at some point of our lives, directly through personal experiences, or indirectly through our families, friends, lovers or colleagues.
So if you ask someone if they are disabled and assuming they are not, the most honest answer they could give you is 'not yet'!
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1645333 - 06 Feb, 2024 - 01:18PM
I wouldn't personally but it in you're profile, I'd wait till you chatted a bit then tell them. That way when you meet them they'll see you for the person you are. I've struggled with this myself, I've told them after a few chats, and sometimes they've just stopped, but the people that want to meet you are worth it .
Good luck
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1614937 - 06 Feb, 2024 - 12:37PM
Most people on here are looking for perfection or, at least, a fantasy figure. You probably won't get many thanks for mentioning your impairment after you've been chatting for a while. As EO says, it's probably best to mention it straight away so that you don't waste your time, energy and emotions on someone who'll "let you down" when they find out.
I wish you the best of luck.
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ClassyLady77 - 06 Feb, 2024 - 12:36PM
With IE I know it’s sounds contradictory but Honesty with a affair partner is always the best policy..
Maybe put a funny spin on it, humour make’s everything better. 😜
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ExoticOrchid - 06 Feb, 2024 - 12:16PM
My personal opinion is that it should be mentioned in the profile from the start ... then there are no awkwardness later wondering when to tell ... not really fair to the other person either to introduce the disability further down the chat.
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Indiandelight85 - 06 Feb, 2024 - 11:30AM
Hi really good question, if you are one of those brave ppl that likes to get it all said in the first chat, and doesn't really care what the other person thinks, and believes that your disability is a part of you, and you don't need to hide it, and that the other person you're chatting to needs to accept it because your disability doesn't define you then kudos to you. Then say it as it is.
But if you are one of those ppl that feels that if the other person knows about your disability and might not accept you then you might as well wait, get to know the person then when the opportunity arises let them know. Rejection can hurt, decide what kind of person you are then proceed. Good luck
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takidemir - 06 Feb, 2024 - 10:24AM
not at first chat but after forward going on your relation, you should say about it.
Funguy77 - 06 Feb, 2024 - 09:52AM
Mmmmm this is a good topic and I’m short yes I think you should. What would the situation look like as there are many different ways a person can be disabled? From the mobility impaired to wheelchair bound all the way to Down syndrome. This topic can get quite controversial and may even upset some.
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