Comments (170)

1447655 - 22 Jan, 2024 - 05:54PM

It's either there or ot isn't. For me it doesn't grow, it's not uncertain, it's either kindly ambivalence or a great honking "hell yes!!!" That only happens 7.4% of the time though.

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1586130 - 21 Jan, 2024 - 08:17PM

@Fluffy - totally agree. I'd go further and say that you know within about ten minutes of a date if they are not right for you. It's the reason why coffee or a glass of wine the best first date events.

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Doricles - 21 Jan, 2024 - 07:29PM

Enigma.. - 21 Jan, 2024 - 04:29PM

Totally agree with everything you said: don’t judge a book by its cover. But I would also add, be realistic about the distance that separates you and a would be IE.

FluffyClouds - 21 Jan, 2024 - 06:02PM

You always know pretty quickly when you meet someone whether or not there's a chance of it going further. Always. Even if it's slight, it's there and is always worth a second date. I can't see the point of further dates beyond that unless you just want to be friends 🤷.

I've had affairs....always been instant attraction and chemistry first date.

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Doricles - 21 Jan, 2024 - 04:48PM

FluffyClouds - 21 Jan, 2024 - 02:36PM

“…. attraction and interest.” equals chemistry. Without chemistry, there’s absolutely zero chance of longevity in an IE relationship.

An IE relationship that lacks chemistry is not destined to be a long affair; it’s something more lurid and seedy and yes, it might well involve the exchange of money for services rendered. Read into that what you will 🤷🏻‍♂️

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Enigma.. - 21 Jan, 2024 - 04:29PM

I’ve had two lovely affairs from Ie.
The first lasted over a year.
The second eight months.
I didn’t have an instant connection with my second Ie.
However we knew that there was something there and by the third “meet”.
Well let’s just say the rest is history… 😃😉☺️.
For those who dismiss females/ males at the exchange of photos.
Disappointed over how they look. So not my type etc… 🙄🤷🏼‍♀️.
Dismiss females/males because you don’t feel an “instant” connection.
Remember some people are worth the effort.
Some have better personalities and are better people than a “picture perfect dream”.
This is the real world.
It isn’t Disney or a film set.
If you wish to live in a world of fantasy and demand perfection… This isn’t the site for you 🙄😂😏.
Good luck 💋

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clemf15 - 21 Jan, 2024 - 04:04PM

I met a woman 6 years ago and started a relationship, she was fun and genuine and have been together up until recently. Things are never as you expect doing this so you must be realistic and adapt to the situation.

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giggly hamster - 21 Jan, 2024 - 03:56PM

@FluffyClouds,

I wasn't saying that was the defacto, and yes, I've seen those who seem to think that a fat bank balance will make upf ro the rest of them.

I was trying to illustrate a point that you should anticipate nothing. Anything can change beyond one's wildest expectations in the most unexpected of ways.

Anyone going in with expectations shouldn't be surprised if they don't get met or alternatively are beyond your wildest expectations.

All I'm saying is anticipate nothing - that's all.

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FluffyClouds - 21 Jan, 2024 - 02:36PM

Giggly Hamster -

Not every attractive person is vacuous, only talks about themself or has absolutely nothing to say. And there are plenty who aren't who also enjoy passing time enthusing about how fantastic they are and what they earn.

It's a balance, attraction and interest.

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giggly hamster - 21 Jan, 2024 - 01:34PM

Anticipate nothing.

You can meet someone who on the face of it you’d never expect to like, or be liked by and suddenly they say or do one thing, or look at you in a certain way and everything changes.

Everyone has an idea fantasy image of the perfect man or woman in their mind, but how many actually have sex with them when they close their eyes?

You meet someone who is utterly stunning and find that their beauty means that they talk about themselves as if that’s all you are there for. You thank them for a visually stunning if not hollow first meeting.

You meet someone who you wouldn’t pick out in a crowd, perhaps a brief encounter or you’re humouring someone because you’re in town and actually the offer of a meal and some time to kill is on the table; and you see in their eyes that they’re totally enthralled and lost in everything that’s you and you’re touched on a level beyond the physical.

Neither you could have scripted, orchestrated or wanted to turn out that way.

antici

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