Comments (99)

orchid1967 - 22 Jul, 2021 - 02:49PM

Rose Bud

I have found the same thing on other sites. Married men saying they are single but actually married...... At least (one hopes) that men (and women) are more upfront on ie.

I don't have a time limit (maximum or minimum) but have found in the past, that this type of relationship tends to be somewhat volatile and unfortunately, short lived. Perhaps I have been unlucky, my longest was just under 2 years.

1393321 - 22 Jul, 2021 - 02:38PM

Orchid1967

My intention is for a LTR. I'm here on this site rather than a mainstream one designed for singles because I want the emotional sense of a regular boyfriend but with enough temporal distance to give me space. Dating a married or single busy chap suits me.

Additionally, mainstream sites proliferate with married guys pretending they are not. IE is more upfront, and I like that.

 4 members like this comment.

1393321 - 22 Jul, 2021 - 02:29PM

Polycarbonate and Bereweeke,

It's different when you do things differently...

...dating a married chap is something you can't readily talk about with your friends and family so many who do have an established IE still come on here for a sense of community with like minded people... a sort of support group if you like. It's a human need and nothing intended to cause offense to others.

Live and let live, I say x

 10 members like this comment.

orchid1967 - 22 Jul, 2021 - 02:25PM

Is everyone looking for a LTR? How do you define it?
A site like this gives us the opportunity to find members of the opposite sex, how, for whatever reason, are missing something in the lives (well lets face it, its physical intimacy) which they hope to find on here.
I'm not sure I am looking for an LTR lasting several years but likewise I am not looking to increase the notches on some ones bedpost.
How does everyone else feel?

orchid1967 - 22 Jul, 2021 - 02:19PM

but as someone else has asked, why are you still on here?

orchid1967 - 22 Jul, 2021 - 02:18PM

Interesting first sentence which makes me wonder. As it was such a short-lived affair, whether you were simply another notch on his bedpost?
Please don't get me wrong, its not a criticism, and just one of those things. I've had exactly the same. You think you've met someone you can trust (yes I know the irony of that, being on a site like ie), get one well, start to commit (as much as you do in this secret world) and subsequently get ghosted after sleeping with them.
In the interests of putting across a balanced view, I know from the conversations I've had with men, it happens to them as well.
Its even harder being 'dumped' in this secret world because, due to its secret nature, we can't talk it through with friends (unless they know of course but I'd guess that for the vast majority no one else knows we are here?). So as the song goes, 'we just pick ourselves up, dust ourselves down and start all over again'.
I am pleased to hear that you have found someone else and thats being going on for several years

 6 members like this comment.

Polycarbonate - 22 Jul, 2021 - 11:32AM

And how did he feel knowing you were on the site throughout?

Again admitting this. Such inconsideration, arrogance and
ignorance

 9 members like this comment.

Bereweeke - 22 Jul, 2021 - 10:37AM

Why are you still on this site? After "several years", is "completely in lust" not enough for you?

 4 members like this comment.

1117169 - 22 Jul, 2021 - 09:53AM

Yes. It can happen if you open your mind to the possibility and let go of your resistance to it.

 4 members like this comment.