Comments (248)

Teresa di Vicenzo - 20 May, 2020 - 04:35PM

I’m not sure about monogamy being unnatural, but I’m not sure this ‘til death us do part’ thing is now as it was originally intended. Barely a hundred years ago, people died much younger (50s was considered old) and therefore marriages tended to only last 20-30 years.

Now people are typically living until their 80s and beyond, making 60+ years of marriage not unachievable (great ..). Sixty or more years sharing the bed of just one person snoring and grunting and farting away isn’t something I relish the idea of.

So I think marriages should be on a five or ten year fixed term. At the end of the term, move on to the next one. Thoughts ..??

 12 members like this comment.

1373861 - 20 May, 2020 - 04:08PM

I have always thought there was something wrong with me, and after 4-5 weeks on this site I have realised there is defo something wrong with me 😂🤪🤪

 2 members like this comment.

851951 - 20 May, 2020 - 03:53PM

Demi0369
I read your comment with interest. What is rude is when you get a sexually explicit first intro message...maybe something to think about in how you handle your approach?

 4 members like this comment.

Electricity - 20 May, 2020 - 03:44PM

Most people don't want to be alone. So we seek each other out and spend our lives together.
That goes beyond sex.
So often the physical intamcy side just breaks down, but the rest remains.
But that often leaves a big hole in our lives.
One of the main but not only reasons for many of us being here.

 5 members like this comment.

1117169 - 20 May, 2020 - 02:46PM

@Dancing In The Rain

I empathise with you completely, but talking to your partner about lack of intimacy won't make them fancy you again if there is no obvious " Fixable" issue, like tiredness or lack of opportunity. You might as well give a cat a good talking to to try to stop it catching birds. Its instinct and primal drive.

Lack of desire for a long term partner happens frequently and nobody is necessarily to blame.

 6 members like this comment.

Here Comes Your Man - 20 May, 2020 - 01:45PM

I think monogamy is natural, only up to a certain point... such as when the kids have flown the nest!

Dancing In The Rain - 20 May, 2020 - 01:34PM

Every one is different, but i would happily be faithful if my marriage had intimacy.

Believe me when I say we've talked it over many times and I've tried everything to light the fire but it is what it is. So I find myself here. 😉

 15 members like this comment.

CroydonCentaur - 20 May, 2020 - 01:26PM

I think that - as with most complex and interpersonal situations- the answer is a matter of nuance, personal choice and shades of grey. (at least 50...)
Would it technically be more optimal, efficient and ideal if we all had one partner, for life, and all were satisfied?
Yes of Course.
But, we dont live in in an ideal.
We have our own wants, desires, drives. Needs.
Sexual, spiritual, physical. And sometimes these conflict with our partners.
Sometimes we want More, sometimes we want difference.
Sometimes we might just want to feel Loved, -or even feel Fucked; by someone else.
Sometimes, we fall in Love, with a whole new person, aswell as our Partner.

Everyones domestic life, personal choices, and Adultery Dynamic, will be slightly different shaped, and slightly differently motivated.
IE hopefully allows us a forum to discover someone to share similar mindsets, desires, wants - and to share bodies.

Thus, monogamy is not unnatural, -but, trying to apply the same formula to all is.

Happy Playing

 7 members like this comment.

Bugwithone - 20 May, 2020 - 12:43PM

Monogamy is natural, as is wondering if you are missing out on something!

We are complex creatures and as you get older you either embrace your lot as its not that bad or you scratch that itch! I take people as they come and not judge decisions made that have make them happy!

Unless it’s malicious of course!

 1 member likes this comment.

Auralistic - 20 May, 2020 - 12:37PM

Hmm interesting .
By just being on IE you would think that the majority opinion would be that its unatural, however there are some contradictions to that . . . Many here . . Both sexes are here to find an alternative patner whilst still staying married but also expect their partner in crime to be monogamous ! . . . and take great exception to them not being .

Then you have the situation in nature where various animals are known to pair off for life ! . .So logically its possible to assume there are parts of nature where monogamy is natural . . .and yet most of nature isnt !

Im just thankful that the female of the human race does not have the traits of certain spiders or preying mantis that have a nasty desire of eating their mate !

My conclusion is that it is both natural and unatural depending on . . . . Your desires and opinion.

 5 members like this comment.